A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

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Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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what is black and white and red all over? a group of people of mixed races playing paintball.

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What is the key to a good anti-joke? A disappointing or intellectual punch-line said in a calm and passive tone.

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kathryn atkins

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what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

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What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

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There were two planes to take off.. One did, the other not at all..

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WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

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What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

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A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

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Fat? Jesse Z

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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