A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Donald Trump decided to run for President.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

White men's rights

Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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