Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances they had to go home early one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends

thumb_up thumb_down -15

It was a beautiful day, John was driving in his car down the street, Kameron was riding his bike preparing for a bike race the following day, and Griffin was having his 7th birthday party. John ran over Kameron and Griffin, he killed Griffin and broke Kameron's legs to where he could never stand/ride again

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road---- because he's having financial and relationship related problems that make his life so hideously unbearable that he wants to kill himself and because he's a chicken and cannot overdose or hang himself he goes for the most viable option as to run across a busy street in hopes of getting smashed to oblivion by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! *Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins* "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" *BOOOOOOM*" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

thumb_up thumb_down -15

did you know that zach is the coolest person ever? no? well now you know

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

thumb_up thumb_down -15

knock, knock who's there? Dave. ....oh well dave's not here man.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your mom is so fat, she had a heart attack and died. It was very sad and she will be missed.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Two blonds walk into a building....they couldnt see it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops