How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

What's worse than finding out that your dog has worms? Finding out that you have worms.

what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

What's worse than a paper cut? 2 paper cuts.

Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was very scary.

What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.

Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

Roses are red, and many other colors too.

Wanna here a funny joke? Will is straight HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA hes gay

How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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