What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Why did David Hasselhoff talk to his car? Because it was KIT from knight Rider and had voice recognition software and so could understand him

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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What's more likely to happen in 2011 than the rapture? Finding my real parents.

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roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

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Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

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roes are red violets are blue we have nothing in common so baby were through

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What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

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Why doesn't a duck's quack echo? Evolution.

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

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Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

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Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

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The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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