Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." Then there is silence and a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone the guy says "I shot in the air and my friend heard it and moved. I think he's still alive." The operator says "Good that means he's still breathing and he's not dead."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not. Sally..

Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

HOW MANY CRACK-HEADS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? NONE, THERE AIN'T NO ELECTRICITY IN THE CRACKHOUSE!!!

How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh?

why is there art classes so people can make beautiful pieces of art :)

Did u think that last joke was funny? Well this one isnt

Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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