I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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How do you blind an Asian man You stab him six times in each eye socket and drop cyan pepper in his eye wound.

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Stop making fun of Stevie Wonder, you dont seen what he has.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

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What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What's long hard and black A drain pipe

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops