whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

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what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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why was the black man running away from the convenient store? He was going for a jog and it just so happened that he passed by the store

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

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first

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

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Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

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Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Me, get naked bitch!

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You are like really sincere aren't you? I really appreciate that in a friend. Thank you for being who you are Nero.

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Knock knock knock OCD

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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