Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -25

There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red violets are red I think I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what goes in hard and comes out soft? bubblegum, what were you thinking?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? A black man eating fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you confuse a blond? Nordic mytholigi. That is, if shes american

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

eoin burgin is fat

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops