Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

Kobe Bryant passing the ball

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

What do you call a chicken that can't lay eggs? a rooster

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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