Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

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How do you offend a black person? Call him a nigger.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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salad days!

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Guy 1 : "I like your hat." Guy 2: "That's my hair, you moron."

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

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Want to hear a joke? Obama

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops