What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Why did the 15 year old commit suicide? Because his parents and 3 sisters died in a car accident and he went to live with his uncle, who constantly raped him.

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Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

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What's worse than dropping an ice-cream cone? A dead baby. What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than two dead babies? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping two ice-cream cones.

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Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

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Wait a moment, I will see what I can do.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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if u ever get arrested by cop, just tell the cop this: "No no officer, you got it all wrong. It was only a game. It's called RAPE."

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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