Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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A man walks into a bar not a duck though

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

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Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

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Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

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Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

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Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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