What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

Why did the boy drop his lolypop Because it tasted bad

Q: What's so funny about medical records? A: You're not the one dying.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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