Why didn't the boy have any pockets on? He didn't have any pants on

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

Poker face

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

What is worse than finding a real joke on Anti-joke.com? Starving children in Africa.

A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

Huh? Whats wrong? Why are you mad at me for? Its my name, it has always been so.

Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

A man walks into a bar. It's a fine establishment. He orders a couple of beers and takes a cab home like a responsible man would. He is then killed with a croquet mallet.

two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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