j.p. is dumb

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A chopped up dalmation...

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What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

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Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

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A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

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What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

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What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

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Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

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I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

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What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

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How did the black person die? Of old age

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What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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