LAMBORGHINI MERCY, YO CHICK SHE SO THIRSTY! IM IN THAT 2 SEAT LAMBO WITH YO GIRL... and I'm giving her some Gatorade because it'll quench her thirst but I'm making sure she doesn't spill on my seats because it's new, k

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Oh...okay, good.

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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9/11

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What did the boy get from Penn State University? A College Degree

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How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

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Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

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In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

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Potato salad

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how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

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Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

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Why did Jack and Jill fall down the hill? Because they were donuts

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How do make a boy cry? You cut off his eyelashes

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What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

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what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

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your moms so fat she has kankles

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If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

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A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your other apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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