Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was shot in the head. Plus the fact that it was his first attempt on a bike made it highly unlikely to succeed anyway.

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

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Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

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A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

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whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

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Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

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What's long and sexy? The Eiffel Tower

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What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

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Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops