Guy: Roses are red, violets are blue, you're beautiful and sexy too. Girl: Roses are red violets are blue, how many girls have you told that to? Guy:... Girl: Exactly.

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What did God tell Moses to deliver to the Hebrews? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

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What's funnier than 9/11? Nothing. 9/11 wasn't funny. It was a terrible tragedy, the most tragic in U.S. history. If you think that is funny you are a sick person. By: Logan in South Dakota

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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Why did the Chicken Cross the Road? The Light was red.

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Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

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Why does Joel's breathe smell?

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My wife is so fat that I find her unattractive.

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

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What did the Albino say to the other albino? Due to heredity and our inheritance of Chromosomes causing albinism, We could be displaced in society but luckily, we have eachother. They went home and lived happily. But not ever after. That craps or normal people. (freaking albinos...)

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Why did Wiggy fall into the toilet? Wiggy was the name of his turd.

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

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Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops