Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

look im not better than you, your a ten im a two your a queen im a fool you got looks i got scares u got talent i got beuty to its a win win

what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

silver bullet?

Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

Take part of what?

My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

You mothers so ghetto, you died.

Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

What do you call a dear with no eyes. A mutilated dear.

why did the chicken cross the road to get to your house knock knock whos there the chicken

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

What did the Rose Bowl say to the Fiesta Bowl? We crushed the Orange Bowl.

Q-What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? A-Where's my tractor?

Why didn't the black guy get paid for doing work hard at labor? it was the year of 1860!!

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR S H I T STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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