Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

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What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he wanted to impress his wife.

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

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One time i was sitting down

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

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Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

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Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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