A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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how did the guy in the wheelchair cross the road he didnt he got dragged down the street cause his chair was hooked to the bus

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Why did? Yes

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

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What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

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Q.what do you call a dead baby? A. a dead baby

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Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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Q: Why did the baby cry when it came out of the moms stomach? A: The doctor dropped it!

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An orthodox rabbi, a Methodist preacher and a Muslim Cleric walk into a bar and blow that month's tithings on video slots.

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A black car pulls up early in the morning and slows down by your house You see him pull a mysterious object out of his car and point it at you, The paper boy tosses a newspaper at you

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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What's worse than r-a-p-e? Gang r-a-p-e.

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why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

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What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

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Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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