An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Hispanic guy walks into a bar. The white guy orders a beer, the black guy orders a shot of vodka, the Asian guy orders a sake, and the Hispanic guy orders a shot of tequila. They were drinking and having a great time.

How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

Malcolm Johnson from Zenith windows, I was wondering if I could speak to you for a while about some fantastic offers which we currently have on double glazed windows....

A gay man walks into a pregnant woman

Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

NEVER

A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

So a boy walks into a bar. He broke his arm and now is severly crippled

knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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