A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

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Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

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An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

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Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

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knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

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why didn't the kid win the talent show? He wasn't talented.

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Why did the depressed man complain about life? He didn't he committed suicide.):

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What's black and white and red all over? Lots of things, including certain ugly clothing.

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

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Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

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Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

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What did the pickle say to the cucumber? I am you from the future!

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Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

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What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

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Women's rights

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

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What is the difference between Whitney Houston and Elvis. They are dead. And it make people go boo hoo

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

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Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops