What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

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Q: what's wrong with this sentence? My dogs is running in the garden A: I don't have a garden

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What's a bench painted red white and blue all over? An American BENCH.

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What is worse than getting hit by a bus? 9/11

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Ah, sorry for my failed attempt at being a witty. Yes, it has been a long day, or so the saying goes.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

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Are you 9/11 because i would like you to destroy my tower.

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What did the astronaut say when he stepped on the moon? Oops, sorry.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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I'm a psychic. Don't believe me? Think of any number between 1 and 20. Got it? Your number is 17. Please comment if I got it right

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

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theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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On a tusday night, three guys walk into a bar After realising they have to work they proceed to exit

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can you pass the soap?

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red pain is spilled on it.

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

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Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

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how do you make a baby float? you take your foot off its head

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How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops