"Never trust what the internet says." - Abraham Lincoln

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Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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How did little jimmy survive the plane crash? He ate all the survivors, then when the helicopter arrived he ate them too and took the helicopter.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done. Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.

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What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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What do you call a Black person in a city with high crime rates? Whatever their name happens to be.

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What do you call someone who sits on anti joke every day? Luke Skywalker

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So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

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Lol! The connection timed out. Double D`s they kill my back so I am gonna get them reduced someday, and sure because it gets really itchy otherwise.

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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Why was the man like a chimp? Because they are 96% genetically identical.

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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Q: what did Katy Perry say when someone told her that she was adaopted? A: That's not true, my parents took pictures of me in the hospital just minutes after I was born.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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