roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don't know, that's why I was asking.

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

What happened while Thomas crossed the street? He got hit by a truck. What happened to Billy? He was Thomas's Siamese twin, and he too met the same fate.

Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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