man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops