Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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Q: What do you call a nun in a wheelchair A: Handicapped.

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Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Why did the man stop running. He was tierd

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Why are Mexicans so good at jumping, swimming and running? They aren't. You're just racist.

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Q.who is Tiny, a lion and has no friends and is a bald eagle? A.Rory Johnston

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What would you get when you cross a bear and a shark? a highly improbable situation because sharks and bears live completely different environments.

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why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the dog lick his balls? Because he can.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

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Little Jimmy had walked in on his parents. "Mummy what are you doing with dad?" "Baking a cake" She replied. Two hours later the cake had then cooled and was consumed by all.

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Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

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27

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Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by 7, who is a rapist

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What do you call a KKK member? ...racist

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How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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