What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

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Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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