what did mohammed say to Jesus? nothing they lived in completly different time periods

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If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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My mom told me I was pretty, I know now that she is a liar.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

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Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

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an american walks out of a strip club.

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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Why aren't there any black flesh-colored bandages? Good question.

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Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

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What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

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What is worse than finding a real joke on Anti-joke.com? Starving children in Africa.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

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Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

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What's cooler than being cool? An object at absolute zero

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whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops