Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

While out looking for sex last week I met a hooker who looked like a rhino. I said to her, "Do you charge?" She said, "Sir, I am arresting you under the Street Offences Act 1959. You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court."

Why did the goose cross the road? Because the chicken was on vacation

What happens if you fell off a 600 foot cliff? You die.

Why did the blonde fail her driving test? She was paralyzed and had down syndrome.

The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

I supported my sisters decision to get an abortion. Still would have been cool to be a dad :/

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

Not gonna tell you, that was one weird story, I feel like super high right now.

What did the blind boy get for one of his Christmas present? A cinema ticket.

I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Then the man pays for the beer and drinks the beer.

Q: What's funnier than rape? A: Many things such as murder or nuclear warfare.

A rabbai , a mexican , and a ginger are In a car going over a cliff. Which one dies? Who cares?

Q:What's similar between a squirel and a eagle? A:Both have wings, exept for the squirrel.

God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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