Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

I can still remember the last words my brother said before he kicked the bucket. "Hey you guys,how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

Insert joke that isn't even an anti joke = The new jokes on anti joke now.

How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

The sword that kills, the sword that gives life.

What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

What's worse than cancer? Nothing.

how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

Q: What's funnier than rape? A: Many things such as murder or nuclear warfare.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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