If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personalities So do I

So this blonde walks into a library.

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One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

A baby seal walks in to a club

All dead all doom or all dead? How can you choose the question doesn't make sense. dead all dooom ohhhaklsdjfla;ksdjfal;skfjasd

I can't see my forehead

You're pretty... PRETTY UGLY

Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

Katlin Poladian liked her own status again.

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

What makes the world go round? Gravity.

Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

Q:What happened to the leprechaun when it jumped in the water? A:It got wet.

Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

Scott

Jess Burns

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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