Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

Two ducks are in a pond. The one duck asks, "Can you pass the soap?" The other duck says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?"

if this joke was a potato, it would be a good potato

How can you tell if someone is gay? It depends, sometimes they can be flamboyant or not. Actually, one could be straight and still be flamboyant, that's what makes the world less boring. Everyone is different, there's no surefire way of knowing, unless of course they tell you that they're gay.

Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

no

How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

How do you confuse a blonde? £74.56.5 x 4^4^4^5 (7) : [15(68yf4+s)]

Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

Black people are innocent.

Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

LAMBORGHINI MERCY, YO CHICK SHE SO THIRSTY! IM IN THAT 2 SEAT LAMBO WITH YO GIRL... and I'm giving her some Gatorade because it'll quench her thirst but I'm making sure she doesn't spill on my seats because it's new, k

Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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