What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

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where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

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what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

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Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

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Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

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Woman : Child,what time is it? Child : I'm not a kid, I Broccoli.

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dfsgdf g dsf g sdfg sdf gsd fg sdfg s df g sdf gs df g sdf g sdfg sdf g sdfgsadg awetrawefads f asdf asdrfasrg sdf nfghjml ho ;l jkm gascSDagfgh dj gf hdfgh khdkfgkfgkj gjkf g afg adf g dfgs df g sd fg s dfg sdfg df g sdf g s df gsdf g sdf g f t r j yu k yuilk yiol o l rt wer t wer t we t w e rt w er

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A black man says "ask" correctly.

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Whats worse then nailing ten babies to a tree? Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

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How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

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is this love , is this love , is this love , that im feeling , no bob im afraid its cancer.

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knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Never mind, it's just an imaginary door anyway.

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Two men walk into a bar. Seeing as the first man could have suffered a concussion, and been seriously hurt, The second man ducks to avoid also being hit by the bar.

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Dead baby jokes aren't funny, dead babies are though.

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What did the old man say to his grandson before he kicked the bucket?? "I wonder how far i can kick this bucket..."

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How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

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Why was the boy hot? Because he was stuck in an oven.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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they make me sick. i hate them all with their big noses. they should all be rounded up and............... Oh I'm sorry, i thought this was anti-jew.com

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There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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A man walked into a bar and was then taken away in an ambulance dude to a severe concussion.

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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