Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

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Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

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Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

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What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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1+1= 69

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A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

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What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? Answer: A Pilot

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what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

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8=>

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Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

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Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

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So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

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Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

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a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

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What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

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What's green and wheels? Your mom.

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it damn well felt like it.

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-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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