what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

whats green white black red and can fly? nothing.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dyeing.

what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

Knock Knock Come in.

My hair is thin, therefore the person beside me wears oddly looking clothes CC

Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

When is a door not a door? When it is a cup.

roses are red violets are blue ill cut your dick off and use it as glue

where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

whats the difference between a white man and a black man? I like cake

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

ghjwASFDJHKJZFKLJFHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHA GGGG DG FUC K DISLIKE ME!

Want to hear a joke? Womens rights

dfsgdf g dsf g sdfg sdf gsd fg sdfg s df g sdf gs df g sdf g sdfg sdf g sdfgsadg awetrawefads f asdf asdrfasrg sdf nfghjml ho ;l jkm gascSDagfgh dj gf hdfgh khdkfgkfgkj gjkf g afg adf g dfgs df g sd fg s dfg sdfg df g sdf g s df gsdf g sdf g f t r j yu k yuilk yiol o l rt wer t wer t we t w e rt w er

In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

The mets are 3-0 this season

All of these jokes suck. Just saying.

How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

why did my girlfriend fail her test? she was pregnant :'(

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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