Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

Why did the girl throw the clock out of the window? The clock was broken, and it was the only valuable object in her possession.

why was the 6 year old boy crying? his mother had just passed away from terminal cancer and his stepdad caught him crying so he kicke hm in the face and told him to man up.

Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

DONT think about ELEPHANTS. Your thinking about elephants now.

What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

what does a chair look like? a chair.

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Q: Why did the white man die? A: because he had cancer

Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

Why is the ground wet It rained

Why wouldn't Helen Keller be able to drive if she was alive today? She would be inside her coffin not knowing how to get out

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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