What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

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Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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Who is Dank? A: Billal

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Nobody walks into a bar. So nothing happens.

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=3

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Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

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I am a dwarf and im digging a hole... lol jokes dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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How did Justin Bieber die? He didn't. And we all need to stop making fun of that poor boy.

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Y did the boy fall down the stairs???? He was In a wheel chair

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Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

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What did one jew say to the other jew? Want some pizza?

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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Ask me if I'm a car. Are you a car¿ Yes¡

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops