A drunk guy walks into a car

How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

So, a man walks into a bar. Suddenly, the universe around him cracks, unable to sustain the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. I don't know, why? A. I asked first.

How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

Guy 1: Hey look under there Guy 2: Under what inanimate object that is physically visible and made up of atoms

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

Whats worse them finding a worm in your apple??? finding out your adopted

what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

Why is the alien dead as a door-nail? Because the door-nail was never alive nor could it ever be dead therefore the alien must have never existed just like the life and death of the door-nail.

Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

Who took the cookie from the cookie jar? Your mom

Who looks like Bill Cosby, Smells like Bill Cosby, But isn't Bill Cosby? An imposter who should be sent to jail.

Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

what's funnier then 15? definitely not 14

What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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