A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

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Why did the man take off his pants A: because they were uncomfortable to sit in

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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YOU

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Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

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LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

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Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

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What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

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What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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i punched my mother in the face once she cried

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why was the boy crying over his dog, his cat, and his bird? Cuz i raped them Wat about his pet hamster? I threw it at a wall

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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