A bear walks into a bar. Mauls every one in it, then is shot to death by animal control.

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What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

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What's red and silly? A blood clot

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how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

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Whats long and hard? a pole

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Jess Burns

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

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why did the chicken cross the road

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills.

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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Why so serious? Why bad grammar?

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Q: How do find the population of Mexico? A: You Google it.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What Do You Call A Japanese Man Humming Classicle Music While Removing Toy Soldiors From His Ear With His Foot Jumping Up And Down On A Large Elephant Strutting About The Universe? Strange.

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Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

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What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

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If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

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knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

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How do you tell identical twins apart? You can't. They look identical.

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Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

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Dana Cohen not having herpes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? the wnba

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Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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