Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

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One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

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What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm a dog

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Why did our black president put a porch swing on the white house? He likes to swing.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Lacrosse

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whats stupid, retarded, and dumb an Erin Perri.

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Why are video games fun? To get a mushy brain :P

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JUSTIN BEING SMART

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what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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Q: What faster than a black man with a t.v A: A jew with a coupon

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“Anything that moves ey?” – William Deane

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Matt swam through watter. Gaby drowned on dry land.

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In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

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Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

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A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

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w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

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How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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