what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

how many jews fit in an oven? none, its illegal to put a person in an oven....

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

Knock, Knock Come in

What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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