What did one dandelion say to the other dandelion? Answer- Take me to your weeder!

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense..............

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Who's gay? Justin Beaver

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Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

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What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

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my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

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once i was a dog and u were a flower........... i raised my leg and gave u a shower :)

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Q: Whats red and not a penis A: A lot of things

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Why couldn't Jimmy go bowling with the rest of his friends? His parents shot him.

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I've lost my tractor!

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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A man drives down the road in a van that says "Candy" He was doing his job in a professional manner

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What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

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What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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Why did the boys shout ZACHATTACK? Because zach was attacking

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? With a ladder.

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Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops