How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

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There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

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How do you make a priest cry? ... You kill his family

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor! why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. why did the farmer cross the road? To get his chicken. Why didnt the farmer make it to the other side? He was hit by his tractor.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

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How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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Why did sally fall of of the swing she had no arms

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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A man tells a blonde "you are what you eat" and she replies "well, i don't think I've eaten any sexy beasts today.'

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what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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where did little Suzie go after the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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Why did the little boy want to sleep with his parents in their bed on the only night in weeks they'd planned to have sex? His bedroom was on fire.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

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A man walks inti a bar and asks for a drink, he shows the bartender his ID and is kicked out because the man is underaged.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops