whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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An English man, a German man and a Canadian man stood on the edge of a cliff. The English and German both jump off. What happens then? The Canadian says "they were serious?!" and runs away to fake his death and live the rest of his life as Frank Brown.

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What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

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What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

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ugvvvvvv

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

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What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

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Jeez Bill, how drunk was I last night? You took my pet parakeet, threw it at my daughter's piggy bank and yelled "ANGRY BIRDS!!!!"

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A bear walks into a bar. Everyone evacuates as animal control safely asses the situation.

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How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? An ambulance.

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Knock, Knock Who's there Cluck Cluck who? Cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck - proceed to bob head and flap wings - cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to, like any other chicken

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what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops