Q: What do you call a drunk man driving a Corvette with no arms, no legs and a missing eye? A: A severely impaired driver

What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

roses are red violet is blue why rik go to the hospital ? cause he eat glue.

Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

How do catch Lady GaGa's attention? Have a Bad Romance

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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ME

Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

a priest and a jewish guy walk into a bar. they both drink as expected and go home to their families

a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

so a man walks into a bar, then the prison warden told him to calm doun.

How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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