One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

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What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

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Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

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What do you call an awesome bucket? An epic pail.

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RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

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What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Q: What do you call a drunk man driving a Corvette with no arms, no legs and a missing eye? A: A severely impaired driver

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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A lepord can carry two times its weight into a tree, i dont have a joke for this yet but youll leave here learning something.

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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How do catch Lady GaGa's attention? Have a Bad Romance

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

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How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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