Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

penis

What's worse than Hitler killing six million Jews? All of the Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctior

Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

What's worse than reading the same joke multiple times? Having cancer.

Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

What's as hard as a rock? A rock

Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

why did spiderman fall off the roof ? cause it was wet

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

This is one LONG empty space isn't it?

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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