Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Q.what do you call a dead baby? A. a dead baby

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How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

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A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

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Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

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why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

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Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

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- What's better than just sitting on a couch in a summerhouse with a bottle of wine and reading a good book? - An orgy.

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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